Fool me twice, shame on me!

We all know that age old saying Fool me once, shame on you - fool me twice, shame on me! I know that you are probably wondering where on earth I am going with this, but dont you worry I'm not talking about my marriage (insert monkey face, followed by crying with laughter face)

I am talking about the things I should have learnt by now, as a mom of an (almost) 1 year old and a 3 year old, I should really have learnt by now.

1. Don't, I repeat DON'T leave your baby without a nappy on

This will result in your baby who has been constipated all weeks bowel movements to all of a sudden start working miraculously and of course your baby will think this is great fun and start to play and spread said bowel movement all over your house.

2. Never, paint your nails - EVER!

Your baby has just gone down for what should be at least a 45 minute nap, your toddler is at school, it seems like the perfect time to paint those chipped nails, don't be deceived, there is never a good time to paint your nails- your baby will wake up screaming, someone will knock on your door, you will realize you had cookies in the oven that are burning- something will happen which will result in smudged nails

3. Don't invest in those expensive 1kg tubs of Woolworths blueberries

Or any other food, that your toddler seems to love eating today, because man tomorrow when you offer them this amazing treat, with such pride and joy, they will tip it over and proclaim how they DO NOT like blueberries, like how did you not get the memo mom?

4. Don't ever, under any circumstances wake up a sleeping baby

You are running late for a friends birthday, or you need to get to the shops before they close and your precious bundle of joy has been sleeping for hours, they should be perfectly fine if you wake them up quickly, right? WRONG! Absolutely, completely wrong- you will either have a grumpy baby on your hands for the rest of the day, or you will struggle to get them to nap again later, but believe me you will pay in some way.

5. DON'T tell your toddlers the plan for the day unless you know with 100 % certainty that the plan will come to pass.

You have wonderful plans to go to the beach and spend a wonderful day picnicking and frolicking in the waves, you, pack your picnic basket, get all the kids ready, toys packed and when you are finally in the car- it starts pouring with rain, and just like that your wonderful plans are washed away, quite literally. Well my dear friend, if your toddler had any idea of where you were going, you better be ready to picnic in the rain, because no matter how well you explain the fact that you cant control the weather and that you can go another day or even later, the louder they will explain that BUT YOU SAID MOM...

These are just a few of the things that I have learnt, but not learnt as a mom. What are some of the things that "you never learn from" as a mom, I would love to hear.